I am not a Sparrow

 Several weeks ago I was watching some birds. I noticed some were especially  disgusting birds, they just looked messy & dirty. I remember thinking "What a disgusting nasty bird!" Then I remembered the verses in the Bible about how God sees every sparrow that falls and how we are of more value than many sparrows. However, I knew there was more to that thought than just God saying he cares more for us than what we consider an ugly worthless and dirty bird. Sooo....being the smart, studious and intellectual person that I am *cough* (that is definitely sarcasm or opposite word day whichever you prefer)I decided to read about this worthless bird that God cares so much for and how it might relate to me or any of us really.

Dust Bath

~Sparrows engage in dust bathing. Sparrows will first scratch a hole in the ground with their feet, then lie in it and fling dirt or sand over their bodies with flicks of their wings. That is one way they "clean" themselves.
How many times have I not only spiritually fell but I have lain in my sin and failure and become more of a dirty mess instead of getting up? Instead of excepting the Grace that God extends to me I kept trying to clean myself or redeem myself. I know, nothing I do can save me from Sin, not good works, not even in living every "man made" standard preached, not by self denial.....nothing. Nothing I do can cleanse my heart from Sin.
 Matthew 10:29
Are not two sparrows sold for a farthing? and one of them shall not fall on the ground without your Father.

Sparrows are frequently used to represent the common and vulgar, or the lewd. It seems like it is an insult to be a sparrow, or a shame.
Could it be God was saying to us, He loves us even when we are at our lowest. While we were yet in our sin? I remember when I was lost,  always trying to hide what I really felt like inside but, at night I couldn't run from God and the conviction and the guilt of my sin. I remember the shame I felt. I remember that heavy feeling of being dirty, used, alone, and miserable. And always the fear of dying lost or Jesus coming back for His  Church, and me not making it, missing the Rapture.....that was my biggest fear, that I would always be the "dirty sparrow", I would be left behind...alone forever. And Yet, God says not only is his eye on the Sparrows of this earth but even the very hairs of my and your head he has numbered
 Luke 12:7
But even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Fear not therefore: ye are of more value than many sparrows.
 When I Google Sparrows the common related searches was how to get rid of Sparrows. It seems the Sparrow is not very well liked by more than a few! Isn't that just like the enemy of our soul, not only does He delight in our failures and our sin, but His ultimate desire is to destroy our lives. And yet over and over again scripture says FEAR NOT, don't be afraid of your past mistakes take comfort in knowing there is hope, there is mercy and there is  God that loves you and wants what is best for you.

One last thought I had was I AM NOT A SPARROW! There have been time when others have tried to make me feel like I was nothing more than a Sparrow. I have seen other people I love or brothers or sisters in Christ be made to feel like they are sparrows, and my heart has broke for them. Life has dealt them an awful blow, or they suffer because of choices made in their youth....lots of reason people have for  feeling like they aren't important and that nobody cares for them. Some have been made to feel that their best was never enough, that they themselves wasn't enough for one they gave all to, some are made to feel that because they don't look a certain way or weigh 110lbs or wear a size 4, or have blonde hair and think it should be brown, some of us let others tell us we are nothing more than a sparrow. I admit I am guilty myself of finding fault in my looks or my abilities, but I pray we never forget we are NOT sparrows,  we will one day soar on wings of eagles, walk on streets of gold, and hello?!! we are children of a King, we have nothing to be ashamed of.

Girls, if the biggest trial we face in life is that we don't have the latest hair cut, wear make-up  like everybody else, have beautiful jewelry or the perfectly manicured nails,  that we wear modest skirts and shirts that cover all that should be  covered EVEN WHEN YOU BEND OVER, instead of wearing the latest fashion and letting all mankind see every dimple of cellulite and fat roll or jelly jiggle you have, cause let's face it no matter how skinny you are.....your still a female....enough said on that, I guess if you want me to be more specific you can ask me, but I do have some "secret male followers" so I will spare them the girl talk! lol!
Seriously.....Your Worth more than that, your not a sparrow, don't "wash" in the dirt, your a daughter of a King. Dress like it, talk like it, live like it and believe it, you are worth something, don't ever let anybody tell you any different. You will never regret living a life of purity, your only regret will be that you didn't. Some godly women live with the mistakes of their youth, and if  they could go back they would tell you the only thing they would change is that they had dedicated their lives at a younger age.

Signing off  for this post, with many heartbroken tear filled prayers for those of you who feel like your nothing more than a sparrow. I love you but more importantly God Loves you