Wednesday, November 27, 2013

"God Won't Let Me"

Ethan & Jadyn went to bed the other night and Ethan took Jadyn's bandz she had made. He wouldn't give it back even though she had already made him one. In the argument/battle that followed she came away these awful red marks on her arms, (even two days later,) from Little Dennis. He, not a mark on him. So here she is so mad at him and hurting from his biting, pinching scratching. He waits a few minutes then,  crying he handed her the bandz saying, "Here Jadyn, God won't let me Keep it!"  As you can imagine this was like one of those gas on flames apology! I guess God was okay with him beating her up....


Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Just another child

Two things happened today that stuck in my mind.
Jadyn came home from school telling me about a new child in her class. A special needs child there because she wasn't being treated nicely in the other classroom by her classmates. It bothered me so much that we humans are so cruel to those that need kindness and love.

When I went to get supper (yes take-out) I was listening to 93.3. A caller was saying how much the Christmas music meant to her every year. She said 3-4 yrs ago her special needs son wanted to hear Christmas music and the station was the first to play it that year right after Halloween.3 weeks later their son died. Every year they listen and how thankful they are for the good memories to sum it up...As the lady is telling the story, her voice breaks and you can hear the emotion and the grief coming thru.

I immediately thought of the two situations. A mom loves her child, while others may only see a disability, or a burden or a tragedy a mother sees... her child, the child she loves.  Just as God loves His children...Look at us, we come to Him broken, emotionally disabled, our mind scared from Life. Not one of God's children are whole, not one of us perfect, yet HE LOVE US. To Him and by Him we are not outcast, not strangers, not abandoned, not forsaken. We are no longer on the outside looking in, we belong.

I am so thankful that I am His. That to Him, I am just another Child....

Jamie



Saturday, November 9, 2013

Surviving the storm

Growing up, out of all my youth group, I was probably the one most would have picked to self destruct the quickest. And let's face it, I was the one I would have picked for sure.
I sometimes look back in confusion, wonder and a with remembered fear, maybe like a person who goes thru a tornado. When I look back it's like I can still see the storm going on behind me  picking up what remains of the house I left behind, I can see where I would be if I hadn't made it out in time, and I shudder in fear.
I can see friends I love dearly still being ripped apart by the fierce winds and I think, "How are you still there? I seen you ahead of me, with the survivors" yet somehow they are right back in the middle of it.  I can see the damage that this Storm has caused them. I see how they try to protect themselves and now their own children, yet the great storm of Life still rages on. I watch helpless, as the wind rips apart their family,and they are pulled their separate ways. Their children suffering from wounds to deep to see. They themselves, barely recognizable in appearance, actions, thoughts. Some have told me, "Don't ever come here. I am miserable. It is an awful place to be, and I can't get out. Don't ever backslide. I never thought I would be here. I want to get out." so many heartbreaking cries for help, and yet when I hear the survivors call out warnings, I see some make it to safety, only to watch in horror as they run straight into the Tornado, something calling to them only they can hear,  trying to grasp something they thought was of value, running after what they think they can't live without. When they do get what they are chasing, it was not what they wanted. But now, they can't get away from it.
 I see a child, no, I see children, many children, daily, who thru no choice of their own are in that storm and are suffering from it's cold heartless wind, with nobody to love them, nobody to care. Nobody to bring them in from the storm wash them, feed them take care of their most basic needs, and never their emotional needs. Nobody because mom and dad are caught up in the storm and never notice nor care about their most precious possession.
I look into the storm and I see those who have no idea they are in a life threatening  Storm, because they are so busy chasing the thrill the storm offers to notice it's danger. To them it has become the normal, it has lost it's threat, because it's all they have ever known.
 Yes, I do shudder in fear when I feel the cold wind, because I remember what it was like to be helpless and hopeless within the deadly storm. My heart breaks for those still in the storm.

If you asked how I made it out, I would have to say, God. There is no other way.